Halfway through radiation

Earlier this week I reached the halfway point through radiation.  While it can feel tedious, it's gone by more quickly than I thought it would.  I think I've even befriended all of the staff that insisted on calling me Rachelle at the radiation office.  Well, the machine technicians at least.  Still not so sure about some of the nurses.  Three more weeks to go and I'll be done with "active treatment".  The Tamoxifen has been uneventful, which is good.

I still have mixed feelings about getting my ovaries removed, but for now I'm back to focusing on treatment.  One thing at a time.  A few people have said to me, "That's it?  You have no other thoughts on radiation?"  No, not really.  Compared to everything else I've gone through this year, radiation truly is a cake walk (I hope I didn't just jinx myself).  Is it a pain in the butt?  Yes.  But besides feeling a little more tired than usual, there's not much to report.  Also, I'm not even sure my fatigue can be directly attributed to radiation.  I suspect it could also have to do with the fact that I'm able to push myself at workouts again, I'm trying to get my running back up, I work full-time and I have two little girls to take care of.  And I'm just worn out from the last eight months.

When I said I needed a vacation, I initially meant just Aaron and me.  But I think the girls could use a vacation too.  Well, maybe not Addie, because she seems the least affected by all of this.  But I'm sure she'd enjoy a vacation anyway.  As I was telling some friends last weekend, the last time we left the country was for our honeymoon.  I just want to leave the country.  It sounds nutty, but we're leaning towards Iceland.  In February (although maybe not for the girls).  Shockingly, you can get good deals to go to Iceland in February.  But I change my mind quite a bit, so we'll see.

As much as we need a break, we also just need to get back to true normalcy.  I think I'm acting more like my "old self", but Belle still knows that I'm going through treatment and I think that continues to cause some anxiety for her.  I think we need to get back to our regular lives for at least a little bit before we jet off anywhere.  So we'll see.